so you know how i got laid the other night? well a condom just came out of me and i dont know whether to be grossed out or happy
i am grossed the fuck out
I was about to go down on her and her dong flopped out and hit me in the chin. This may have a Nam like post-traumatic-stress-disorder effect on me.
I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
I wish my mouth had a period so that could be my excuse on those days I don't feel like giving head
hey, when you wake up, search yourself on youtube
my sister already found it, were watching it right now. i give it 2 thumbs up.
You talked to that cop for like 15 minutes and when you got back, you told us you were "networking".
started to yawn and threw up hamburger helper instead. awesome night.
I definitely recall eating shredded cheese out of the bag while you were wearing that apron.
I've started grabbing my boobs in front of my lesbian philosophy professor so she'll give me a better grade. It's working...
I only think it appropriate to apologize for making out with your next boyfriend. It won't happen again.
I immediately retract my statement involving hylecopters being allowed to blow up sharks out of the water.... The idea if it is super incredible but ultimately it would be cruel and unessesary
It's a sad statement on my day when the high point was getting a pap test.
Don't send me nudes asking me to come fuck you on lunch break then send me a video of kids you're babysitting.
My name will be tattooed on his ass by sunday.
Watching a guy pay his tab with a check. Jesus dude...
Randomize