Ha. Yes. I'm at a strip club. I'm the barack obama of strip clubs
THE most awkward situation I have EVER been in
Also, I just threw up a little in my mouth and had to act like everything was totally fine.
Pete just told the whole party I'm a squirter
after everytime she pucked, she insisted on us all giving her high fives
im sitting in my room wearing my power rangers shirt watching a movie about a magical dragon. Ive totally forgotten what having a sex life is like.
She asked for her virginity back. I don't know what to say
Do pleather leggings scream im easy on a first date?
So because I got upset you didn't answer I threw my phone in the garbage disposal last night
jen just told me ur idea of revenge was saluting while letting his bong float away while attached to some balloons.
Proudest moment of my life. Just watched a guy walk into the side of a car because I winked at him. Love these yoga pants and my hair. Fuck yes. His mouth was hanging open.
just had sex in my dorm hall public bathroom while wearing my favorite cat sweater. tonight was a win
Don't have sex in a tent there are so many opportunities for infections
Woke up with two different pairs of pants in the pockets of a jacket.None of the above are mine.
I've reached the last of the wine in my cup so now I have to sit up in my bed to get it through the crazy straw
I have no reason to put on pants anymore. This is my new reality.
Randomize