Got some. In a truck. I will just pee you in the morning i guess?
I will die if light touches me.
I can't sleep so instead I'm thinking of all the things I would love to do to you right now
That's weird, I usually just count sheep
I was just at the urinal, started to go, then farted, then said oh yea out loud, then heard someone move in the stall behind me
even in the morning, she still thinks my british accent is real.
She's either too fat to type, hammered or has terrible spelling.
he was extremely fucked up- he thought my sports bra was his boxers. even when his leg wouldnt fit. at least whiskey dick wasnt a problem
Smoked all day yesterday and even more today. Just survived high dinner with mom and sister. Thought I might eat the whole table
i'll llet you know if at any point this night starts to make any sense
I remember you fighting a small man for the last of the pizza. Was there a midget in my house last night?
You are one with the wind and sky, bro.
I can't sleep. My mind keeps asking "turn down for what?" but it won't accept any of my answers.
If me saying "come f***k me now" is talking, then yes.
Sorry for not calling you back. I got drunk and passed out on the kitchen floor. I just found my phone in the shower.
After everything I’ve done… had sex with people off tinder, gone to clubs and bars, gone to hockey games…. I get Covid at GRANDMAS HOUSE
Randomize
