I understand how i shit in my shoes, but explain why you were wearing them.
Nothing kills the mood more than a jesus song.
i crushed up some extenze and put them in his protein powder - should make for an interesting gym experience
This chick just checked into her walk of shame on Foursquare... I think I'm in love.
If Bret Micheals dies..will VH1 have to go off the air?
Lesbians are nicde people they do not take debit cards
I should not be in class today. For the professors sake.
We just leapfrogged all the way to the bar.
she kept asking for a lobster dinner while she was crying. it was actually the most reasonable drunk chick request i've ever heard.
Sadly, she's the porn star that got away
The best was when you were crying, and trying to get the bouncer to "understand you AS A HUMAN BEING"
I don't think anything is more terrifying than the thought that you might shit your pants in front of your boss
he told me he wanted me to go see his cat. apparently i was more interested in playing with his cat then having sex.
I can see. My condolences to your vagina.
Are you coming over for scrambled eggs and hand jobs?
Randomize
