real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
i hope thats the last time i ever see ryan's hairy ass fucking
my periods are so regular now that they are sync-ed with my subscriptions of vogue.
She's trying to master eating with her feet. She said it was be she "always has to be prepared."
Voted patient of the month again at the urgent care. I need to rethink my life choices.
Second night back. Go to house party and played ring of fire. Me plus five other people completely naked. College wins.. It's going to be a long semester
Sun* burn. But that sounds like wait.. Midsentence thought... It would be like swimming in a giant bowl of cereal.. Only I would be cereal. This is brilliant.
I figured out that he lasts longer when I rap during sex. He made it all the way through "Love the Way you Lie"
Judging by the garbled spelling in the calendar reminders in my phone, drunk me really wanted sober me to take a pregnancy test today.
THIS IS A FLATMATE WARNING! The white powder next to sink is washing powder I spilled and is not meant for human comsumption. I repeat- do not digest, snort or smoke the white powder next to the sink!!!!
I'm so confused as to where the sexual euphemisms end and the drinking starts
I haven't been hungover in so long I'm actually looking forward to it
This girl I interned with got engaged today and I'm just like over here taking plan B with my tacos and PBR.
I think i'm the first person to get kicked out of a club while completely sober. Come outside please!!
Get the fuck in, we're going to Taco Bell.
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