just saw Chris Hanson on the street. looked immediately around for video cameras. why is that my immediate reaction?
If there was an emoticon for a sad penis, i would send it to you
I crashed her parents' car cause she was giving me road head. Its probably best to just let them think I'm a bad driver.
Literally just spent 45 minutes converting my paintball gun to shoot condoms....
we're almost there. Shes pounding on the car window telling the nurse whos on a smoke break to fuck off.
just got tipped $5 to put a barbie in a waffle cone and drip caramel sauce on it while a group of dudes cheered and one took pics. 90% sure they were sober
The guy in the American Flag bikini was telling the women he was disgusted at the amount of alcohol they weren't drinking. Then it got ridiculous.
You keep saying things....but all I'm hearing is kegs
Just put an ad on Craigslist for a fake groom... I'm sure only non creepy sane people will respond to it
I JUST ATE A STRANGE BURRITO, I SHOULD NOT BE EXPECTED TO KNOW ANYTHING RIGHT NOW.
Want to know what makes for a better story than treehouse sex? Getting busted during treehouse sex
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
Sex is always the answer.
Especially if the question is: what have I not had this year?
They left around 10:00 this morning. I've been naked since 10:01.
The best part of last night is not remembering half of it
Randomize
