I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
it was like getting a handjob from mrs. butterworth
and parents always said I was only motivated by money. Pfft they forgot vodka.
I think my penis got bigger when i lost weight
You passed out in my bathroom last night. I put a towel over your face so I could shit without it being gay
Yeah? Well I'm currently predrinking downstairs in my room by myself. Absolut and water with a hint of mint because I'm using the glass I keep my toothbrush in. Fuck, you bitches better get off work soon.
I think the camel was justified in biting me.
Just caught my dad doing coke in my bathroom again. Guess whose getting a new car for christmasss.
I don't give a damn about what he wants to do with his life. Personalities are for pussies.
We got high and watched Winnie the Pooh. Isn't that what every normal person does on their break?
You attempted what you called the "Long Island Heist", in which you shoved a half glass of Long Island down your pants and asked me to help you sneak it out. That drunk.
I was thrusting to the beat of Felix Navidad..
Dude, I need a fuckin wingman and this could finally make us eskimo brothers, how can you pass that up?
I can't say too many people would say watching their drunk best friends fuck in a hot tub is very normal.
Gatorade without vodka just doesn't taste the same
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