I molested 6 butterflies tonight
you might want to delete the history when you're done using the computer at work. did you ever find out what the white balls in your throat were?
I just accidently tagged myself in the picture of the 16 year olds spreading their legs in bikinis. Failure.
im walking the streets of bville with a bag of cat food..looking for my car. i dont ever want to turn 21 again.
he turned the pretty ricky playlist on. its about to go down.
He pulled his dick out during the Bourne Ultimatum, ruined it for me.
just cheers'ed a flock of cattle as i drove past eating a burger i bought 7 hours ago. that high.
no you went to jail because you don't know how to whisper when offering a cop a blow job. I'm sure him having a chick partner didn't help.
Was last night real? Did I lick your forehead while you laid in between my legs while we laid next to your boyfriend?
He started using my brother's rc helicopter as a beer delivery device. He's a drunk McGyver.
Was your wine and cheese snap taken from the toilet?
I can't believe I forgot to wish you a happy 13 week-iversary of the time you raw-dogged a rando. Only two days late, so it still counts. And since your 14 weeks is coming up, you should know that at 14 weeks your baby can squint, frown, grimace, pee, and possibly suck his/her/their/zir thumb!
Im including "no monologues past 1am" in the list of apartment rules. Theatre majors dude.
His dick is curly. It's adorable.
I realized my soar muscles form the shape of me leaning over a toilet
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