there are singles shoved down my panties. this is the type of summer job i always wanted.
we were exchanging secrets last night... she told me about how she put markers in her vaj in middle school. found a keeper.
The world would be so much better with thought bubbles.
Also pencil in smooth jazz and illegal activities. The usual.
I just woke up in his house on his bathroom floor with an IV in my arm.
we found him. outside on the balcony, sitting on a bucket, with his pants off, swearing he was'nt taking a dump
i just remember doing it on a pile of clothes while i heard the muffled sound of his friend laughing. then i realized we were in a closet.
How soon is too soon to enter the slutty phase of this breakup?
I told him to pick up the beer can he threw in front of the police station. So he gets out chugs whatever's left and throws it back and says ok let's go.
I'm not leaving my family to go to a strip club on good friday.
it is basically gonna be an ugly Christmas sweater rave
You kept chewing on the empty milk carton and saying "kitty" over and over again. It was an interesting night.
So i had a lucid dream about blowing myself. This is why people love me
Also, what day were you thinkin we should trip balls at the children's museum?
And god said thou shalt never deny free booze. And it was good.
Randomize
