Ha. Yes. I'm at a strip club. I'm the barack obama of strip clubs
I thought pig tail meant you were suppose to grab on to it when getting BJ
In other news I saw a pack of make believe zombies walking down green st.
gotta love wednesdays
Okay, lets just agree to keep all cutlery related activities to a minimum.
TINY HANDS NOT FOR BUTTHOLES
This is going everywhere on the internet.
Not going to lie- I'm a little freaked out camping right now. This is one of those high activities you don't do by yourselves...or close to bears
I bruised my vagina when I was climbing out of the trash can.
Well I'm currently debating between getting toilet paper or getting my eyebrows waxed so... There's that
"She's seriously grinding on him while whispering into his ear, 'take me to McDonald's.'"
I downloaded the presidential playlists for offline listening. And Obama made a night one so we have presidential approved fuck jamzzzzz. Thanks Obama!
Ladies don't puke and tell
My roommate just google searched "cumming blood" using my laptop. Her boyfriend is in her room, she looks scared. Words cannot explain how hilarious this is.
I have vodka, fruit gushers, and health insurance. Let's party.
just licked the cheese off a burger. that high.
Shhh embrace your inner whore. Just embrace it.
Randomize
