grandma shit on top of the toilet
The ticket read "Found nude in a tree"
just to let you know, don't open your linen closet for a while until i come over with a cleaning kit and geek squad
I said make yourselves at home, not to put a used condom on my ceiling fan.
Which is worse rug burn on your nipples or laying there after wondering how long you have to cuddle before you can sneak away?
i wish his balls had a scratch and sniff sticker elsewhere so i would know before i even went down there
Thanks for walking over, a conversation about David Bowie's dick as a muppet is exactly what my day was missing.
scream really loud. we think you crawled under the deck
there isn't one for "I'll give you an I'm sorry blowjob" but that's also an option you have. in the meantime here is an emoticon of a caterpillar
so I guess I made a note in my phone last night to remind myself not to do shrooms on the cruise ship
Look, I've got a really big car. We just need to put ourselves in it and put some body parts in other body parts.
Well, at least you look pretty when you're disgusted
Anyone who can sit 4 hours in a doobie circle with their feet in a kiddie pool is ok by me
When they said they were gonna tattoo each other's gamer tags on their asses, I knew I no longer had a boyfriend.
You laid on the floor and pet their rug. and then demanded Voss water.
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