I just tried to pee in a pad to see if it was like a diaper. it's not.
I've thrown up so many times in the third floor bathroom of Baldwin that they should probably just go ahead and name it after me.
he broke up with me while standing outside, half naked, waiting to fuck him. i feel like a leper right about now.
Only she could turn her genital wart appointment into a date night.
Through drunken recall, I have managed to bring back awful memories of losing my virginity. And possibly traumatized my niece trying to get her to "learn from my mistakes".
Remember when I booked a hotel room for next sat? Nneither do I.
You got cut off after you tried to make the dog funnel moscato.
OMG IM A TIGER AND I LOVE ROARING
I almost tried texting you with my pipe. Holy fuck this is good shit.
i'm hungover but need to study so i had a vodka orange juice, three ibuprofen and an adderall for breakfast. what up med school
My dick looks like crazy bread
pics are now mandatory
Nah, he's definitely here somewhere. Whether he survived the night or not is your problem, but I'm pretty sure he's around.
I've fucked him twice and literally had no idea that he's missing a thumb
He was really cute! And I know but it's just like getting my fix ya know? He's basically a human vibrator.
Do you have feelings for this penis?
Randomize
