My new storm is the chrons
The only reason I needed a new one is bc I threw up on my other one(248): And since Verizon doesn't have a throw up test, I was eligible for a new one
I really love her but I don't think I can go the rest of my life without anal.
Then all the boys were saying that they were amazed at how much i could smoke...i'm so proud of myself
Best. Handjob. Ever.
I'm guessing Kelly is over?
Nope. Home alone.
His bond is $50,000..margarita Monday might get cancelled
you were wandering around the street for like an hour singing "nothing but socks on"..an original you wrote after the 12th shot i believe
I was just counting ceiling tiles when he ate me out, it was that bad.
please don't text me until you can spell three letter words again.
Exactly. Motivated vaginas are the best kind of vagina
I did the walk of shame in nothing but a sleeping bag and now I'm on my way to pick up plan B. Let's not make a habit of this.
Sounds like a good New Years
You kept trying to make people drink "salsa-ritas." But all you did was dump tequila in a half full jar of salsa, and shove it in people's faces while shouting at them.
Just remember, Dont make worse choices than american flag pants to your own birthday party
he told me "apparently my gag reflex doesn't work so if you magically grew a penis I would deep throat you"
i'm face down in a ditch right now please help this is not a metaphor for my life this is real.
Swimming turned traumatic when grampas shorts slipped off..
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