Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
Jack off faster Americas best dance crew is beyonce themed
I intend to get homeless drunk
At the wedding. Seated next to the bar. No way this ends well
yeah, it's no longer just 'day drinking' when it's 5pm and you're knocking over fruit displays at fresh market
Im sleeping in your bed. Sorry for the sand and the noise and the loud people. Im starving
Your blankets are not drunk friendly
He paid me $20 to swallow a baggie of glitter, which turned out to be the best decision I've ever made. My vomit has never been prettier.
Walt said he was feeding me so I wouldn't die. that's why there was pasta in my room
Vodka drinking games. Where you wake up next to a douche lord and see your thong in the blinds.
God I hope the gutter I die in is nice. You know, for a gutter.
soon, soon....
I don't believe you anymore. You're like the boy who cried coitus.....
I LOVE YOU NO MATTER HOW MANY BALLS YOUVE SUCKED
You shouted, "LOOK I'M HAWKEYE," and beaned mike with a dildo from across the room.
It was the needle in the haystack of teary, unpleasant handjobs.
The abomination is in progress. At least one barista side eyed me and the other has fear in her eyes
Randomize
