Ever had blood in your semen? I am guessing that's a problem.
its not college until your roomate walks in on you having sex in his bed. twice
every time i recognize a doctor or patient at the hospital on this rotation, i just pray it's not from my blackout saturday makeout slut moments...professionalism shouldn't count on weekends
Pretty sure a homeless guy just told me to 'lick his balls clean' because I looked at him.
Well, love is in the air. And by that I mean: it seriously smells like sex in here.
Sometimes I send them texts like "I want to make you cry and lick up your tears" just to fuck with them. And THAT is how you get rid of a Stage 5 clinger.
Joe decreed the livingroom and the hallway up to the burn mark his kingdom. I think this is the point of 'stage an intervention'
Shes definitely an expert at this. Her happy hour goes from 4 to 11, then she starts drinking heavy. She also allots 15 minutes each hour for a pee/bj break
I wanna throw up and cum in that order
I have to answer enough questions about you, I don't need your uterus tossed in the conversation.
I think that thing where I have 2 boyfriends is happening again
oh the usual. high as balls and crying about the hunger games.
That's a really terrible idea.
Awesome I'm gonna do it then, thanks for the input
Thanks for being my best friend so I can use you as an alibi to my family while I'm out getting some dick in my face.
The neighborhood cougar just purred at me while I was doing yard work. I’m terrified and tumescent
Randomize
