Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
I'm going to rape someone's good day.
so later when i'm crying over him remind me that he once called his penis "senor weeper"
I told him I was pregnant. Figured it would soften the blow of telling him I had herpes.
Did it?
Not as such, no.
So I was watching the View and they were saying oral sex is the new goodnight kiss
So when are we having a sleepover?
I woke up and went to my kitchen naked and decided I wanted a fruit cup. Ate said fruit cup. Look over and notice my male neighbor is staring at me
btw, i had a dream i drank 260-proof vodka last night. thank god that doesn't exist in real life.
i have a wrist watched drawn on my wrist that it says shot o clock
He was showing him the picture of the 40 year old woman he made out with in Florida, turns out Chris made out with the same woman.
Go her
I can't even tell you how many rave sticks I tore apart with my teeth last night.
I woke up to a shot of jager next to my face. I felt bad for it so i drank it
I have what looks like a rubber stamp mark on my cock from last night that says "Magic Marla Approved" Do we know a Marla?
For an hr, you were convinced you no longer had a right arm so you played Super Mario Bros with just your left hand vs Beth. You won btw, mite b why she refused to wear the unicorn head
It still amazes me Mike had to have neck surgery after eating me out so much.
I will warn you that there is a pic of me riding a buffalo....and for the record, I was completely sober!!
Randomize
