im insabelyl wasted and diont know if ill yexyed tou. call me
im watching my roommate bang this girl. she doesn't look like she's any good, because he has a bored look on his face...
I boned her and wore a Freddy mask once. It was pretty lol
I'm getting very good at recycling my hook ups. So even though i'm having more sex... I'm the same amount of slutty.
Yes! I like to call that picking from the buffet!
I just wiped my vajayjay with snow. Bad idea.
i am positive it's ok to drink. it's just pieces of the plastic knife i forgot was in the blender.
mid-sex i was thinking.. these are not the right balls slapping me
I am literally using a balloon as a pillow on a park bench.
You should probably stop your little brother from ruining thanksgiving. I just caught him trying to stuff a cake in a drawer... And now he's puking.
I'm pretty sure I asked his brother if he was gay while drunkenly falling to the ground.
I am actually offended he hasn't asked me to sleep with him yet to get better grades...I wanted the whole college experience.
Also I feel like death. But like. In a good way
I dont even know what happened i just remember waking up with beer cans outlining my body...
youll appreciate my drinking habit one day...
Apparently my hair turned out really good because I got my butthole licked by a stranger last night
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