you lied. pity sex is amazing.
It's like there testing me. My dad kept handing me margaritas and saying "you can take it"
I know i'm the slutty cousin, but be honest. have you ever got your nose ring caught on a guy's zipper?
I'm not sure if doing him was such a good idea. Yes the sex was good, but I'm scared I set myself up for failure in 2011 because he's the hottest guy. Ever.
By the end of the cruise, there was literally nothing in our room he hadn't peed on.
there are chunks of pepperoni under the sheets. can you be here in 10? breakfast in bed?
She just looked at him and said "I'm gonna fuck that" and it totally worked.
For future reference "I'm too drunk to come today" is an acceptable line to get out of work. I love my job
a guy just walked up to us....drank the rest of my beer....and said sorry for my loss before walking away.
which guy lost his keys in my bed this weekend?
I've officially slept through a hurricane, a tornado and had sex during an earthquake. I'm surviving.
His sister hates me so I took his virginity on her bed
I’m pretty sure I have teeth marks on my neck
I am the image of restraint, it's why im just hungover and not in the hospital
For the love of all that is holy just take the tranquilizers Erica
Randomize
