If you had to guess, would you say that as a species, midgets are more or less flammable than humans?
Less. Duh. They have less combustible mass.
i just threw up in front of the washington monument. such a scenic puke.
she kicked me out for pissing in the recycling bin. I mean, is it really THAT big of a deal?
So at what point do I tell her that I like fucking these hot southern girls more than I like my relationship with her?
Solid. Can't put a price on good times
You can and it's called a liver.
Woke up with your brother in my bed...where do you want me to return him?
MY FUCKING CAT JUST GAVE BIRTH AND IM FUCKING STONED AND I FUCKING DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO!!!
80% sure the drag queens carried her home
You kept sacrificing me last night. You would just yell out "Virgin Sacrifice!!" and then throw me into a circle of men.
I'm definitely closer to having sex in every building on campus than I am to having a post-graduation career/plan/future. Unless that future is getting fucked in lots of buildings. I got that shit on lock down.
Of course I'm going to see her again. She had waterproof handcuffs in her shower.
hey u leave my anime porn out of this
I'm not sure if 14 year old me would be disappointed or proud that I fucked him behind her middle school??
Just had a threesome for the second time in my life. I don;t even enjoy threesomes. Too much effort.
HOW DO THESE THINGS KEEP HAPPENING TO YOU?
Text me some of your sweat
Randomize
