The guy dancing on me has three visible teeth. WHERE ARE YOU?
Last night at the bar my fuck buddies found out about each other.
Wtf? What happened?
Not quite sure but they rock, paper, scissored to see who was taking me home.
Dude I think I vomited on the wireless internet box too...it isnt working.
Remind me to tell you the "if you give a mouse a special brownie" story when you get back
Good news.. I found out what I did Saturday night. Bad news... I found out what I did Saturday night.
I cleared a drunken path to my bed for you. If you hit clothes you've gone too far.
welp wont be popping out a kid with a beret. frenchie is gone and the mother nature showed herself. bilingual kid can be erased from the bucket list
Just did coke off of a cross necklace and am headed to the strip club. Happy Easter!
Rush week is fine, only the t-shirts are white and if it rains, the frat boys in their lawn chairs will be treated to 800 freshmen girls in their first wet tshirt contest.
Welcome to college.
that's all we do, eat and hve sex, eat and have sex. he thinks it's bad and that we need to talk more or whatever but I'm just not seeing the problem...
I think the paper my teacher just handed back to me had one of his pubes on it, I'm way too hungover for this
Did I let your boyfriend smear a banana into my face last night? Because I have pictures that are telling me I did....
I feel like that xmas present negates everything we were taught as little girls. Putting out DOES pay. God bless us everyone
Everyone needs to leave the house so I can use the good vibrator without being judged.
Also, I'm not that drunk, but I'm thinking of pulling the blinds all the way up and casting some porn up onto the living room TV to establish dominance over our neighbors.
Randomize