u cheatin on me?
if i did i would try to upgrade babe.
if i die, you can have my worn out liver and american apparel deep v's.sell the liver to a chinese restaurant
Do you think the new Crest Whitestrips Advance Seal would stay on while I give him head? It would be great to knock out 2 things at once...
I am not hooking up with him just to see what his penis looks like.
Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
that sweater is a total boner killer. you might as well be wearing a wedding dress.
My rats are drinking wine. I am drinking with rats. God i am so alone.
One huge ass giant mistake followed by celebatory shots and coors lights thats my day in a nut shell
Hypothetical Question: Would you take a cougar bullet for me?
Come to the roof. We are drinking breakfast.
can you please not set my house on fire for once???
He's a cop. Do you know how many times I've said fuck the police? This is my chance. I'm taking it.
Finally finished unpacking shit from school n found a bra with no idea whose it is... I miss college so much it hurts sometimes
I don't know what kind of bucket list you have, but having sex with a tree isn't on mine...
The hangover struggle is to real, just passed the drive thru window. Twice.
Randomize
