i wonder what barack obama's brickbreaker high score is...
found an empty one..2nd door on the right...i'm already naked.
I have decided to cut my hair. This is based solely on the fact there is too much of it to clean vomit out every Sunday afternoon.
like the penis drawn on my face is so detailed and well done, i'm not even upset about it.
I fucked her while she was wearing her boyfriends dogtags. I'm officially a bad american
I wonder if she thought to herself "I'm gonna sleep with that guy tonight" when she watched me puke on the bar at 3 in the afternoon?
i took it, then realized you live 3 ours away. but if you start driving now, im almost positive I'll still be hard
I am at the point where deciding not to drink alone is worth a rocky music montage in and of itself.
I am self-sufficient. I puked in a wine glass and emptied it in the trash. Points for style and neatness
I puked walking onto the plane. How do you think my post-Birthday hangover went?
For the sake of my mom, I can't sleep with two guys with the same name. She has a hard enough time keeping up as it is
You took photos of my underwear around London the day after! THAT was too soon.
He's a waste of a perfectly good penis.
hes sooooo boring!!! I feel like I’m in a relationship with myself now. I have an 8 inch dildo under my bed, THATS how much I’m in a relationship with myself.
Whoever was the bastard/bitch/genius who duct taped my keys to my dick so I wouldn't lose them. I hate you.
Randomize
