I haven't seen Daniella all day...are you sure she was safe going home with that guy?
oh don't worry! i asked him if he was a rapist. he said no
i'm drinking out of my 'black like my president' mug
mornings like this make me wish i was morman.
I told her I was pledging and she immediately proposed to give me head in the bathroom. i love how easy rushees are
Woke up with feathers in my hair. at work. still drunk. sooo awkward.
Hawaiian shirts and no dignity
We are always on the same wavelength...kinda eerie.
Please fuck him. And then let me tell her. And then let me protect you from the knife she pulls from her Ed Hardy purse. Please.
i'm ready for this baby to gtfo so i can get coked out.
The nurse told me they're using the same medicine that killed michael jackson.
I can't even teach it... It's just natural slutyness.. My mom has it too
seriously. next time...underwear. I'm not spending any other holiday season wondering if it'll be my last babyless one.
I WISH WE COULD PLAY THE DRINKING GAME TOGETHER AND THEN BANG FOR AMERICA.
I was hammered helping a pregnant woman at the gas station name her unborn child. We had to try everything with two different last names because she was waiting on the results of her paternity test.
Okay but look at his jawline. I NEED TO RIDE IT.
That's why my boobs are so big, they're full of secrets.
Randomize