Like all of my pajamas are shirts of guys I shacked with in college
when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
dude u gotta turn down the techno when u bang that chick its creepy
apparently smacking a customer in the face with his iPhone was not part of the WOW factor we learned in training...
The tent wall coming unstaked in the wind and hitting me in the face really sobered me up
I call it my summer of slut; except summer lasts from May until December. It's been incredibly successful
I am a terrible person. This is almost as bad as when I was going to see my ex while my boyfriend was at that funeral.
No I'm not coming over. That Bob Ross drinking game is too intense.
found a rock and smashed the sliding glass door. home safe. screen door is locked so we're good.
The melted ice in my drinks tonight is probably the most water I've had in like 3 days accumulated.
He showed up to a baby shower and kept telling everyone he was late because he was pregaming. And then tried honking the pregnant girls tits
Congratulations on your downgrade, shes one hell of a 5
My mother is even happier about me having a sugar daddy than I am
he's single and there are thong briefs.
Randomize
