Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
i wonder what thom yorke's orgasms sound like
explain the missing patches of hair on my cat. now.
Yeah well margarita Wednesday already came twice this week and it's just now Wednesday
Woke up this morning with a junior police officer sticker over my nipple this morning.
Exotic beer tasting at my apt right now and by that I mean I bought random beer and I'm drinking it on my balcony
bringing my vibrator into the shower with me. if I don't text back in 30 minutes I have electrocuted myself and died.
May the force be with you.
After last night I think its official. Deep down, we like alcohol more than we like women.
So on a scale from 1-10 how gross is it that I used mortuary makeup on my own face?
Ohh I see how it works, eat pussy and I get Reese's pieces.
I mean. I just want to sit in my bed and eat bagels. What's wrong with that?
We found out if you get Ben high but stay sober yourself he is an AWESOME cook. You need to get your ass down here, this goes against everything I know to be real.
That was right around the time that the drunken mess pulled out his dick in front of myself and like 10 other people and started peeing all over the train platform while saying, "Sometimes a bear gets you brother. Sometimes a bear gets you."
Pretty standard Thursday night commute for you, no?
I just loudly threatened to kill a self checkout machine
My boss and I ended up at the same strip club. We both got lap dances while talking about work.
Randomize
