I'm having one of those days where I just want to lay in bed and beat off all day
It's one of the reasons i'm here, along with emotional support, physical support if you need it, and power orgasms.
Dude also, my grandma got me condoms for easter and kind of winked. I don't know what to think
Just walked in on the Yellow Ranger getting porked by a guy in a UD Blue Hen costume. Will somebody PLEASE think of the children.
so i say "rick dont build that sandcastle" and he "says ok i wont" then i wake up and its sandcastle fucking city all over my apartment
I can feel the fear and stress bubbling in my stomach. Or maybe that is the pregnancy.
i am an animal i am literally locking myself in my house and not coming out for a week i don't deserve to be in public
We dug deep emotionally while eating cereal
No more weed for you
Any chance I can buy my dignity back with $45?
Hi I am too sober and out of rum. Translation: I owe you some beer. Also, get better taste in beer.
this case of pbr just wont end. i keep finding more.
The cat be actin like a 2:30 am poop is the time to tell me all about her thoughts and fears in life. No bitch, this is definitely alone time.
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
Do you remember feeding the vacuum doritos last night?
hopefully I won't be diving through a thorn bush to escape an explosion this time
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