I wish there was a Glade Plug-in for vaginas
ya i looked horrible drunk and pregnant isn't a good combination
being a part time student has turned me into a full time alcoholic.
2 showers later and I'm still finding cum on random body parts of mine
i yelled out "tuesday" during orgasim. he fucked me into 2 days from now.
let's get a trip to cabo together for next spring... they have to have forgotten about me by now
you kept looking at stripers and saying " Go to College"
He's freaking out just because my cat licked his balls while he was fucking me
You have no idea how pumped I am. I literally plan on dying. You're in my will
I'm beer bonging chocolate fondue. That's how my Valentines Day is going.
We were all day drunk by 2pm. Now I know why they hate Americans
Pissing into the Grand Canyon is the single most liberating thing I've ever done in my entire life
He's two decades older than you. Remember how you said you wish you lived in the 70s? HE DID.
My desperation for dick was off put by his anime figure collection.
Always great to be boarding a plane when you realize that what you thought was gas is actually very untrustworthy
Randomize
