I don't care what he thinks. My vagina has an open door policy.
He made me a period mix..should I back out now?
I have to fuck proof my bed. It was in the middle of the room this time.
98% is good enough for me. Kinda like birth control. Worth the risk
Im so tired of dysfunctional exs fucking up my relationships with future dysfunctional exs
"Shots" of grape juice. I fucking hate Utah soooo fucking much.
From now on I forbid you to refer to it as a "bed". From now on you must only use the phrase "sex wagon".
We were in his kitchen and she turned to me with a straight face and an avocado in her hand and said "Can we steal this?"
He called his dick the "gentle giant"
That seems dangerous to buy acid from a stranger on craigslist
I feel like it should at least be like a "hey look I'm actually fine that I drunkenly gave you my virginity!" friend request.
For a girl who cried from fear the last time she was asked out, this. Is. TERRIFYING!
Foreplay went from me being a bank teller and him a customer to us actually having to go to the bank so we would make rent
You chipped your front tooth on the toilet bowl. Should I call your dentist?
You passed out in my backseat like a legitimate infant. A really drunk, really horny infant
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