did you know they have Ed Hardy school supplies at Target? it's like folders and notebooks for little douchebags in training.
Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
i am one more weekend without sex away from dosing him with viagra and locking ourselves into a closet.
i havent blinked in 235 seconds. now 247. now 258. 263. 267. 271. i also have been gifted with theability to both type and count and not blink. 293 so magical
I was an emotional waste case that night. She made me stroke her ponytail.
He needs to respect me before he can fuck me with cat ears on.
It's supposed to be a shit show, it's an end of the world party.
Gotta admit I did think about bartering you out to the gay guys for $20 and the dudes flashy neck scarf
Should I go sleeveless of strapless?
Hmmm, it doesn't matter. You're gonna be topless by the end of it.
Is there a lightning bolt coming out of your boner right now?!
Idk how much of a virgin he is but I'm tryna find out.
If God is analyzing my life right now extremely proud or dissapointed but either way I took wednesday night drinkin to new levels
dollar rum and cokes, see you on the dark side of infinity
He's a downgrade and it was quick. But it was dick nonetheless.
Listen, she cheated on him first. I've known both of them since we were 12. They have no secrets from me. And yes, as a matter of fact, I absolutely did enjoy screaming out his name into his, soon to be, ex wife's pillow.
Randomize
