have you ever wondered what it would feel like to stick those coneheads in your vaj
omg every time its on
He just turned on a sound machine. I need to get the fuck out of here.
You're going to have to buy me a lot of drinks before the bee suit goes on...
he made his penis look like a sprinkler when he was coming. it was pretty cool actually.
You fell out of your barstool, I tried to help you but you said if I got any closer I'd be drinking my meals through a straw, So there you sat.
did you see me getting spanked by that lady cop who was a guy?
"But puppies!" Is not an acceptable excuse for trying to drunkenly steal someone's dog, you promiscuous midget!!
FYI your bra is now hanging in the hallway as a trophy.
Regardless of your intentions, deep throating a Twinkie is NOT sexy. You owe that poor cashier an apology the next time you pump gas.
I finally had to say "that's the hole where I pee" for him to understand.
You introduced yourself and she said "wow that's a long name" and you went "yeah well you should see my dick."
Today, my weed came in a pokéball. I officially love my dealer.
FUCK and YOU. times 10. To infinity and beyond. You bastard. Worst. Cockblock. Ever. I'm going to nail your sister.
I will most likely miss you the least and fondly remember you as Mr. "I need a minute" but really need 24 hours and 4 extra inches.
Never going back to jail again. Only time in my life I've ever had a wet dream about jerking it...
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