let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
despite contrary belief, getting peanut butter off your balls is not as easy as it sounds
You unbuttoned your shirt and started walking down the center of the road screaming traffic stops for Enrique Iglesias.
the lighter is IN the bong. I don't know what to do
I'm gonna sleep with her just to prove to my roomate that shes a slut and he's wasting his time
Cuz last time you told me I was going to be shocked about something you got a hand job from a stripper in canada
I accidentally lit my hair on fire and we broke the bed. How was your night?
My legs have surpassed "hairy" and entered the territory of "furry". Maybe I should just suck it up and shave already
No now I'm curious!
It's a little sad/awesome that I scored coke within 60 seconds of walking in the bar.
The student becomes the teacher.
Last night, I listened to Aladdin on my ipod while I stole bread and cheese from Wal-Mart. I feel like you're the only one who'd be proud of me.
I am eating a king sized snickers in the strip club. Good morning.
I have need of you to return home with haste, as I require the magical capsules you possess to relieve the posterior pain I am living. I battle this demon with stubborn grit, however I feel that defeat is on the horizon.
The fact our science teacher from high school was buying us drinks and hitting on me doesn't matter.
I tried to cut you?! I'm sorry! PS where's my hair?
Plus he probably didn't want to be at home, alone... Jacking off on the big screen without you there to lend a helping hand. I mean, let's be honest. It's not fun if it's not a little weird.
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