hungover and i feel like a burrito
like eating one or like you are one?
like i am one.
I think it got a little awkward for her when my dad walked in on us and did nothing except leave half of his pizza on the table for us.
My adult sexuality and some of the best memories of my childhood collided like a Pee Wee Herman wet dream.
Elaborate
Strip Mario-Kart
How's your threesome situation going?
Optimistic
The last thing I remember was doing a line in the shape of Texas
Sorry I couldn't reference you in my facebook quote. I will redirect any likes and comments straight to my blowjob efforts this week.
How did I pull off convincing everyone that my name is Dad? Maybe they were just distracted by my boobs.
I just had a sexting conversation using medieval jargon. I think he is a fine suitor.
I just want some dick and chicken fingers please advise
However, you did manage to order seven different drinks while fingering her at the packed bar - it was like watching the pizza men pound the dough in the windows
I'm just hitting the tip of the iceberg on accents for this trip...so basically my panties are done for.
are you drinking tonight?
I have an exam tomorrow
so yes.
Idk what's happening right now but im wearing a tutu and pissed as fuck.
YOU WILL GIVE ME MASHED POTATOES OR I WILL RIP YOUR SOUL INTO 7 PIECES AND YOU WILL TURN INTO LORD VOLDEMORT
21st birthday weekend in Vegas has concluded and all I'm missing is my underwear and 'Contacts' icon on my phone home screen.
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