Astroglide: It's like Bengay for your ass.
Does having sex in the men's bathroom on the boardwalk count as having sex on the beach?
i know we're in college but you cant booty call me at 3 in the afternoon. i dont care how drunk you are.
I FOUND THE PROF I'M GOING TO FUCKKKK.
I want to fuck you with a popsicle till it melts then eat it out of you
Really.
I just told my sister I love her. I'm in no condition to drive.
He got drunk and insisted on licking my eyeball and called it a test of my trust in him.
She told me she eats fruit when she's hungover because it has more water than water.
Just found bud in my hair....gotta love curls
Her boobs take up a lot of room so God had to skimp on the brains
He kicked in the door just as I climbed on top of him...and stood there. I felt like I was in a porn. It was invigorating.
I sang "A Whole New World" while I took his virginity
That is awesome that you did that.
I need rollerblades now
Rollerblades pick up bitches
We decided to try to steal hot dogs but it ended up with me punching him in the face and crying. Pretty solid night
I'm pretty sure he's playing the harmonica in my shower right now. I just really need to pee.
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