There is no way when we get home that nothing will hapen
Friends are holding an intervention and have no idea this gatorade is half vodka. This is gonna be the best intervention ever.
I thought he was kidding when he said pretend to be a dunkin donut delivery women. This is the last time I ever role play.
Yea.. I remember nothing. Except that the taxi driver was 56 years old and apparently never cheated on his wife.
I think I died last night. I had 14 beers..well 13 1/2 if you count the one that got spilled on the baby in the elevator.
YOU DON'T JUST GET TO CALL AND SAY YOU MIGHT BE DEAD, THEN NOT ANSWER!
I'll pretend I don't know she's blind, my morals claimed the back seat in this adventure.
I'm excited for you as you venture towards new drug experiences
are you listening to the theme from Jurassic Park whilst pooping?
I was christened with Fireball shots by some guy at the bar. I'm practically Jesus now.
Dude I used amphetamines responsibly today though. I snorted one in the am for work and then chewed one in the pm for other work. I'm an adult.
You know, this is NOT how I pictured my life would be when I was younger, and yet here we are.
You're supposed to discourage my sluttiness not bring me hot Colombian men
On a scale of 1 to shit show you were "i just pissed myself"
I'll be naked. By 11. Then arrested. Drunk tank adventures
Randomize
