I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
Her "get-your-paper-done-early-blowjob" incentive is the thing that has successfully deterred my procrastination
It's a shame that I don't know his last name. Actually, it's an ever bigger shame that I don't know his first name
You were competing with my dog to see who had the stronger bark....
So I feel bad, Ross is asking questions, I think they need to know it's a Spanish lesbian bar
They are currently going door-to-door asking the neighbors to donate money for Cheez-Its and gift wrap. They asked me to stay back at the house to make another pitcher of margaritas.
i had choclate birthday cake for breakfast and am currently flossing my teeth w a condom wrapper. at work. hot mess for 200 alex
I guess the study abroad went badly, I gave him a joint and he just smoked it and cried all the way from the airport
You handed J your Mayan-pocalypse shopping list and told him he wasn't getting laid unless he brought everything on it. Where is he supposed to get a live goat?!
I am gifting my birthday sex to you, but its okay because I can always just have birthday vibrator.
I've drank literally 19 beers and am still good. Utah is worthless
Aaaaand my mom is wearing jeggings...
This Christmas I would like to thank Jesus for cocaine.
I got really adventurous too. Like. Balls in the mouth adventurous.
It's not even a normal fucking affair I've found myself in. It's a fucking bdsm clusterfuck.
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