They have glow in the dark condoms. That's so scary.
Something like a penis light saber.
Jesus people on campus asked me what i do for joy. I said i love sinning especially pre-marital sex.
how many times in life can you be kicked out of a pizza buffet for vomiting on the food and insulting small children
i just lost my virginity over my 3 hour lunch break..
u hav a 3 hour lunch break?!
i like how the length of my lunch break is the thing that phases u
how bad would it be if i made his twitter my home page?
Today was my first day of hebrew and I learned how to say give me sex... I think I can quit now
When I say rough sex, and show you scars from past encounters, pulling my hair a little IS NOT GOING TO CUT IT. And he just doesn't understand.
i've learned that i'm good at stealing things. like live cats.
Get to the bar. Power hour leading up to the rapture.
he stopped talking to me, quit his job, moved out of the province and then told me it was "no big" when I called him apologizing...
About to throw up, bathroom line up, Bro sees me. Yells, 'PUKER GET OUT OF WAY' THEY ALL PARTED WAY THREW ME INTO A STALL AND CHEERED AS I THREW UP INTO THE TOILET. we are going back
The guy I blew last night was pierced in multiple places. I had to use extra caution to avoid my temporary filling.
That's what you get for doing kinky shit with a guy that lives in his moms basement.
I think the God that I only kind of believe in, definitely hates me.
he's been 21 for 38 minutes and he's already trying to fist fight this dude over his girl
awwwww babys first drunken mistake
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