We had two amazing nights in a row...it was so weird...I couldn't even go to sleep cause I thought maybe it was just in his plot to kill me.
well on the bright side, he charges $60 for an eighth
so he'll probably take me somewhere nice
For someone who "only drinks patron" your lack of pickiness with men alarms me
What's a "vodkaffle"?
It's where she puts vodka in the waffle mix.
She found 60 bucks at the strip club. Its probabably been in a vagina but really most money probably has
So another one of your girlfriends from middle school had a baby. Thank god you are gay, otherwise you would definitely be a dad by now.
A guy wearing a shirt that says "eat shit and die motherfucker" just held open a door for me. He's got manners.
He tried to take a picture of me naked but only got my ass. I don't know his name but if my butt is a guys wallpaper, that's the one I boned.
YOUR DICK HAS BEEN IN ME I DO NOT WANT TO BE SET UP TO MEET YOUR FRIENDS
I found an inside smoking lounge. I'll be here for the next 4 hours. A nice old Canadian lady has befriended me and let me use her lighter. Fuck Hartsfield-Jackson AND this layover. I win.
I'm kinda surprised he wouldn't be honored to take me back as a fuck buddy.
Dude come to her party. Someone just took a body shot of rubbing alcohol
I'll meet you in hell with unlimited boxes of wine though
well it was naive of you to actually think you're the only bday sex he had lined up for him today. I'm just suprised he actually had a line forming outside of his room
Okay she just told me to turn the volume down on the fan. What does this even mean?
Randomize
