You should just wear a sign that says "I like cheap Chinese food and anal"
I like taco bell too
You litterally reached into some girls shirt, pulled out her tit and yelled whats up with this guy.
No more Irish car bombs ever.
I guess I puked all over my hand too and I just looked at my roommate and said, "fix this."
I took my shirt off and stood in the kitchen for an hour and a half talking to his parents about my tattoos
I borrowed a glass of wine. And the bottle. Your cat said it was ok
Finishing last nights 1.5L of wine and beef jerky for breakfast. Work looms, ever the prickly bitch.
I just woke up under my desk. Not to worry though, no one is in the office yet
Nothing tops off the night like giving emotional and spiritual guidance to a 70 year old transvestite.
If I die, sorry about rent.
I admit it could have gone better but look at it this way, since I broke the urn you don't have to worry about spreading the ashes.
We could never date. He doesn't drink and he won't bring me tacos after sex. He's on that healthy life bullshit.
Just got up.... With the club stamp on my ass.... How did it got there????
I'm trying to imagine how upset he was when he realized that he had been cockblocked by a picture of a sloth and I am drawing indescribable pleasure from it.
I was dressed as Waldo and the cops kept saying looks like we fuckin found you
Randomize
