As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
Her sex list was a LOT longer than mine. She tried to justify it by saying '4 of those don't count because they were in the gang bang'.
I made a vision board specifically for the purpose of boning john mayer.
She had her laptop open and there was microsoft word opend and all was written was "no italianoo"
so jimmy johns showed up at our party last night. our house is sponsored now. living the dream.
If I had a penis, I would stick it EVERYWHERE. I don't know what these guys are doing.
This is the third time that ive slept with him. He bought me more milk. I can feel the romance growing.
And I can say one thing, I look pretty good in high wasted pants. I don't know if that helps. But I do. God I'm high.
Waking up to find your mom holding your birth control pills and telling you I suggest you take this
HOW IS IT EARTHLY POSSIBLE TO DO THAT MUCH DAMAGE WITH JUST MY THUMBS?? HOW???
Alive.
So much puke
let's make a party pact right now just as precaution for this trip: ill make sure you don't piss yourself if you make sure I don't bang my cousins friends. deal?
We were coming but I found wine on my way out the door.
I am about five seconds from ripping off my clothes and throwing myself into the ocean to become a mermaid
At one point in the night, as we were running from the cops, I clearly remember you yelling "little gnomes are tickling the insides of my body!" ...that high.
Randomize
