You know your from las vegas when the girl on the stage in the strip club was in my US gov class senior year
you should have heard her the other night. no sentence related to one preceding it. it was like she was in etch a sketch and when she moved she forgot everythin
His hospital is closing...I consider it "sorry you're losing your job" sex.
What are the signs of a concussion? Please don't freak out.
yeah they are definitely having sex in that car. joe just yelled through the window telling them to do the "titanic hand print thing"
I should probably just look up vagina pictures in the anatomy textbook. That always cheers me up.
Steve is gonna hang his bear rug on the wall because he doesn't trust us not to have sex on it...
how the hell did this chicken wing end up in my cast?!
no, throwing your underwear at it is not the solution to everything
Please just fuck her. She's new to LA and doesn't know anyone nice.
How do you leave a condom wrapper under my mom's pillow...
This may not be the best moment to laugh, but I am.
my parents have to start far too many of our conversations with the sentence "this is an observation, not a judgment" than I'm proud of
you weren't there so I had to flirt with him on your behalf
What, wait. You are not supposed to drink wine out of the bottle?
Don't know where this pizza came from but i got breakfast in bed
Randomize
