We may or may not have a drunk cat on our hands.
So on facebook, the pictures from my church mission trip are right up next to the pictures of my first time on E. Sorry Jesus.
I'm so hungover even the car commercials make me nauseas
You put a nerf gun to his head and demanded him to take you to taco bell..
There are empty beer cans all over and the go-kart is missing. I need it for my halloween costume.
In the middle of getting a blow job, she looked up at me and said "this isn't the first time I've done this today"
Not sure if you carved a butthole or vagina in that pumpkin but that didn't stop high Phil from mounting. My study group is horrified.
Somehow ed fucked carrie while purposely not saying a single word to her all night. He just nodded and smiled.
Would it have been easier if he talked to her?
Yeah, but i bet him he couldn't do it. Now he gets a free taco bell combo of his choosing.
Last night I had sex with one of the groomsmen I was in the wedding with. In a stairwell. 13 years my senior. Thinking I should retire from the bridesmaid gig.
He's not replying to my booty call. Like wtf. You have ONE PURPOSE IN LIFE.
Are there any rules against fucking the hot TA?
Maybe for her....
Her problem, not mine
I need a costume for that party. Even if I'm just taking it off.
You're such a good friend. You send me pictures of your boobs when I'm sad. I will always appreciate that.
I was puking for like ten minutes when I realized my parents were fucking in the shower and were afraid to come out
My parents are coming to visit the 28th. How bad is it that I put a reminder in my phone to "hide sex toys"?
Randomize
