You are like a prophet. It's amazing how many people you convince to be lesbians.
Are you still at the party or did I leave?
Do you remember trying to eat gravel when we were walking back to the dorm?
...Then she just started hitting me with a loaf of bread.
What are the signs of a concussion? Please don't freak out.
im really going to miss that car, so many blow jobs...
Cause your way of greeting people at the club was grabbing a tit and jiggling it while yelling a name, which usually wasn't theirs, and guys weren't safe either.
If you could come over after class and poke me with a stick to see if im still alive id really appreciate it
I did something similar high once. I stopped like 30 feet in front of a stop sign because I felt like it was running towards me and I started crying. Got out my car and hugged it and told it not to run away people need it.
What did you two do last night and why did Sam send me a picture of your dick?
Is her birthday actually on cinco de mayo? That makes so much sense
It's not too terrible. You just got a little naked and broke your arm.
FYI my mom is sending thanksgiving "samples" of her fancy pot stash for us this weekend. I bring the BEST family leftovers.
he brings me coffee and gets a blow job. not sure if I trained him or he trained me or it's simply mutually beneficial beautiful.
Can you come get me? I woke up in the woods behind the Super 8. I have pizza.
Randomize
