after he passed out we removed everything electronic from his room, stuck in some old books and an ancient typewriter from goodwill. for 20 min. we had him convinced he'd drunk himself backward in time.
I only have two playlists on my iPod. One for when im getting drunk, one for when I'm getting high. Is this something to be worried about?
creepy tank top guy is at campus health. he's hitting on a girl recovering from a panic attack.
I just did the math. 30.36% of girls I've slept with have cheated on a significant other while doing it.
so why was i the only one who woke up with ham stuck to my ass?
as you might have guessed from my lack of texts, the herpes have calmed down.
I feel like i could break down a fucking wall with this boner
Soooo, coming over soon?
When I don't want to forget things I put them on my cigs.
C smoking isn't all bad
i just came to a realization. Besides probably food, in my lifetime i think i have spent more money on legal fees than anything else
No, dude...I agree it's great in theory but I promise you that 80 drunk 21 year old sorority girls together in one room for formal is one of the worst drama filled ideas ever. Ever.
just like cleaning my room and being more organized in my life. more so just making sure a toaster doesn't end up in my car again for 2 months
My life has turned into sitting in the driveway listening to Total Eclipse of the Heart while staring at the Blue Moon. Hey, August. Let's be nice. I need help.
I am at the car wash dressed as a turn of the century librarian
Love waking up to a new contact named “Pizza” btw
Invitations to sext will not be acknowledged until 10 a.m. EST. Thank you for your cooperation. We apologize for any inconvenience.
Randomize
