apparently, it's not a good idea to make jokes about sending newborns through airport security xrays. the moms dont see the humor.
But why'd she put it on the conveyor then?
good penises are hard to come by.... must be the economy...
We just found a handle of vodka in our fridge and no one knows how it got there. God I love spring break.
The mystery has been solved. Seagulls have sex doggy-style.
Well, I'm eating cake, watching wedding videos of people I don't know, and crying. Clearly I'm a vision of mental health today
we decided it was best to cut you off after we caught you trying to "baptize" my cat in the jungle juice
koolaid chicken. i marinated it for 2 hours and roasted it on a rock in a fire. it was bright blue and raw. but that shit was tasty
Osama's death just kick started our Cinco de mayo celebration. Margaritas for anyone wearing red white and blue!
Houston, we have a blender
I guess I really am the only person in this world who can successfully have a no-strings-attached threesome on the beach.
Everyone is slow dancing to Aerosmith. I am serenading a slice of pizza.
Sex on roller skates
Floating mattress
Tie
well a fat roach just fell out of my hair. so there's that
Why even have a ground level apt if you're not gonna let me climb out the window? I hate walk of shaming in front of toddlers...
It was a good dick. I give credit where credit is due. A good dick deserves praise.
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