i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
Yeah, but I'm out of licorice and there's no way anywhere near here will rent us all mopeds on a Tuesday night.
i just heard one Asian kid say to another, "i bet if i could get into Harvard i could get laid all the time, my brother lost his virginity the first night there."
The stoners next door have their couch on the sidewalk again, shirtless, soaking their feet in a baby pool and listening to loud ukulele music. I want their life.
Slutapocalypse this thursday. Invite every freshieee you hooked up with this semester to my house. Think of it like a meet n greet for them and battle of the sluts for us.
He woke up, got my bottle of water and poured it on me and then went back to sleep. Not really how I want to wake up at 2 a.m.
He has until sunday, then my legs are officially closed to him
And on the subject of embracing my inner whore, I had two different dicks in my mouth yesterday. Friend, it's official. I'm completely outta control.
I DO NOT KNOW WHO SHE IS, WE HAVE NO MORE FRUIT, SHE CAN'T STAY HERE.
Ice that vagina down, get some coffee, and try not to walk with a limp. It's time to dominate, pull it together
I think having a vagina should be considered a skill, give me a break.
sometimes, you gotta take him by the hands like tails took sonic, and fly him into the bedroom.
You forgot the part where I played Slip and Slide with my own puke and fucked up my knee.
Well get back to your date and give him the ceremonial 1am handy and text me when your done.
why is half of my head shaved?
Randomize
