Do you ever make guys send you dick pictures just cause it's hilarious?
How far into the semester do we have to be before it's ok to get drunk in between classes again?
Sitting here wishing there were men in my life.
me too. too bad ive decided to fill that hole with cookie dough, closing the door to future men one fat cell at a time.
Thank god the bicycalist i hit was on drugs
He gave me a hug and said "He doesn't deserve you, Anna. Your boobs are great, and I'd fuck you anytime. Any. Place." I need a new 'gay' friend.
Watch the news tonight. They interviewed me about a fire. I was high as balls so it should be entertaining.
You are the voice of reason. And I'm bringing wine. Like seriously this is his last chance. Don't touch me once, shame on you.. Don't touch me twice, shame on me
Heres a quick tip! When getting black out head from your girlfriend dont come to and say "wait... wheres my girlfriend"
Remember that time you gave me a fat lip with your vag? We should do that again!
A guy claiming to be the Japanese counterpart to the White Power Ranger is trying to take me home....
Whatever. I just want to indulge in this mcchicken and forget all about his tiny penis.
I got to walk around for eight hours wearing power armor and acting camp. No way I wouldn't love it.
As she came, she moaned Roll Tide. I kid you not.
we thought it would be safer to lock you in the car alone downtown than take you back home to pass out
i just used your hair clip to unclog my bong. i miss you so much!
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