I just got a bj @ my old preschool...my childhood memories r all ruined
he just wrote my ten page research paper for tit pics. i love my boobs.
Romantic bubble bath turned into splash war. We can't be adults about anything.
totally just got a week extension on my midterm by telling my prof that I had just found out I was adopted
I actually kinda like her but everyone else hates her, so consider it a third party grudgefuck.
dude you had a hot girl interested and took shots together, as soon as it went down the hatch you upchucked on her entire existance..
successful birthday. 2012 rules
I let him fuck me in a batman costume. Don't talk to me about needing to read fifty shades gray.
I FINALLY HAVE A REASON TO DYE MY PUBES BLUE!!!
Just so you know my hand is still healing from where you drunkenly clawed me last Saturday
If you put those two in a room together it'd be like a Taylor Swift fantasy and an Adele nightmare just licking faces
Getting food poisoning after eating at work was the cherry on top of my "Welcome back to real life" sundae.
Keep two things coming: nudes and puppy pictures
I just watched two birds fight or fuck. It was crazy. Another bird was watching closer and I know that bird understood what was happening better than me.
I can see. My condolences to your vagina.
God... We're terrible. I'm so proud of us.
I know! It makes me feel all warm inside. Or maybe that's just me getting closer to hell.
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