what do kids with lesbian moms do for father's day? like do you talk about it? is it awkward? do you get the butchy mom a card?
May i just say it is extremely difficult to pee in a cape
i have now learned nap means the same thing as sex in college
New favorite sorority...they made me pancakes in the morning and welcomed back the walk of shame girls with a round of applause
So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
In the hospital waiting to be tested for the first uti of the school year....I'm BACK BTICHES.
I found his backpack for the weekend. All it had was ping pong balls, mardi gras beads, and Tums.
So i think i'm going to frame my summons tickets and give them to dad as a christmas present...
I'm taking stock of m life as of right now and my Friday night plans are to drink a 30 rack by myself so I can have a tv stand when it is finished�
All in all only spent $2 at the bar ln... Fucking love having a vagina
I'm putting you on my Emergency card so i can spend the last ounce of strength in my hospital bed to flip you off.
I would sacrifice a finger for two more hours of sleep.
I left the bar I'm on a bench across from the bowling alley taking a nap please come get me. I've had three lollipops.
Did I send you a drunk selfie with a pine tree last night?
Well I kept shouting "you're groovy" at him and then I had a 15-minute argument with the bouncer about how many 9s there are in 100... it was definitely time to go home.
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