Just try to lay there and not be pregnant.
I just won 10 dollars from out chugging the bar tender and I found out that the baby aint mine in the last hour. I don't even care if l get laid tonight any more.
high. he's playing 'oops i did it again' on the ukelele. is this real life?
That's like lying to my vagina. I can't betray it like that.
Some chick just tried to plug her vodka into the wall.
I didn't scare your mother by showing up on the roof, did I?
I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.
A pack of naked men just sprinted down the street screaming in German. It's 5 AM.
I have a test in the morning in sign language about signs for drugs and alcohol use. Im drunk and rolling a blunt. I've never felt so confident about a grade in my life.
Oh wow. I almost tweeted #TweetFromTheBackOfACopCarTuesday but I didn't think it was that appropriate
most desperate stoner moment might have been when we filled the bong up with pond water
desperate times, desperate measures
Why are you awake at 6am and liking photos from rando Russian chicks on Instagram?
Then my perve supervisor asked about your vagina. And I was like nunya, but its glorious
Woke up this morning with a darth vader helmet and a bath robe on with my toenails shitly painted
So I just went to clothing optional bar
Randomize
