so i decided not to tell her that her fiance is cheating since i already bought the bridesmaid dess
Im a photoshop master, i successfully reduced the size of the pupils of all the girls I made out last night with to prove they were not that drunk. So glad the camera goes home with me.
her bridesmaids come in huge, huger, wtf, and free willy. all their gown are strapless. its like watching the Hindenburg waddle down the isle.
i was able to set 4 alarms to make sure i woke up in time for class but i couldnt take the open beer out of my pocket before i did cartwheels down the hall...
Home, forcing the cats to make out. Someone should get some.
Not many best friends can say they've all made out with a homeless guy
she puked as i came inside her. that has to mean something.
If you wanna be a real wingman, create some insecurity and comment on that pic of all the hot girls with "Id do every girl in this pic.. except the fat one".
I will not be held responsible for my vagina's poor judgment.
He expects to fuck my tits but will ignore me in public.
Stoned, and eating Doritos, and reading about lesbians for class. This is the life.
I'll take care of you. Just let me pee on this old white person's car first.
I felt like a responsible adult. A responsible adult that may or may not end up shitfaced. But not heaving purple puke into a urinal like last time because I'm classy now.
Not sure if I should ask if I can have my underwear back or just avoid that all together.
Puked up breakfast after doing my first minze shot in a while, but that shot was to Trump losing the election, so it's all good.
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